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What Are The Alternatives To Modern Day Monogamy?

1823 words - 8 pages

Malcolm D. McRae Jr.Beck, 1101 MW Essay #2 7 October 2001 What are the alternatives to modern day monogamy? Modern day monogamy is a flop. Any person can see this by looking at the continual rise in divorce rates among monogamous marriages around the world. It is evident that marriage is on the brink of extinction in the United States with a divorce rate of over 50 percent, and this rate is continuing to rise (1). A book can be published with all the statistics of how marriages are continuing to fail in the United States and around the world, and the pace at which divorce rates are continuing to rise. It is very hard to even document or calculate how common it is that many monogamous ...view middle of the document...

A monogamous relationship is a closed two-person relationship. An ?open relationship? is a relationship where there is an agreement among the members that it is acceptable to get sexually and/or romantically involved outside of the relationship. Specific rules within a relationship about such involvement are usually negotiated to best fit the people in the relationship. A ?group marriage? is a marriage involving more than two people. This type of relationship is not legally recognized in the U.S. or by most major religions in western society. Many people do it anyway, often making legal agreements that function similarly to the legalities in a usual marriage. Swinging is a sub-culture of people who enjoy being sexual with acquaintances and/or friends. A ?triad? is a relationship involving three people. A ?tertiary relationship? is an emotional and/or sexual relationship(s) with little or no ongoing involvement. These are just a few of the many different kinds of polyamory relationships(3). Now that the basic different kinds of polyamory relationships have been identified and defined, the real live concerns, benefits, and applicabilities can be addressed.Most people have participated in polyamory and are in denial about it. An adult who has not been intimately involved with more than one adult is rare. It is just common that adults only get involved with other adults on an intimate level on an individual basis. Once a person has become intimate with one adult (loses their virginity), and then goes on to become intimate with another adult they have participated in polyamory. Peggy Vaughan, author of The Monogamy Myth, said that the original meaning of monogamy is to be involved intimately with only one life long partner, and this was a common belief hundreds of years ago (4). Yet, as words change in their meaning people have come to think of monogamy as being intimately involved with one partner at a time, and this is because people in the western world think of having multiple intimate relationships as being socially unacceptable. It is funny to see how popular view has changed from having multiple intimate relationships being socially unacceptable, to having multiple intimate relationships is alright as long as they occur one person at a time.People have raised the argument that polyamory is just another form infidelity and promiscuity, yet the people who raise these arguments are ignorant to the polyamory way of life. There are some poly relationships that do not even involve sex. The great majority of poly relationships are based on honesty, trust, openness, and individual respect. Love is viewed as an infinite resource by those who practice polyamory where the body and sexuality are sacred, and relationships are viewed as a path to personal and spiritual growth. In poly relationships there's room for more love, more intimacy, more possibilities, and more people. There is a small percent of swingers and open relationships, but in these...

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